Good days and bad days endlessly ebb and flow.

Why do the good days go by so quickly and the bad ones seem to drag on forever?

I feel a little silly when that figurative shadow passes and the light in my heart is burning brightly again.  It happens every time. Yet somewhere in my mind I still doubt that I am going to feel that light again.  But always, I do!

It is a wonderful feeling, and perhaps that is the point of it all.  If I didn’t suffer from despair some days, would I be able to experience true joy on others? 

Of course, this is not an original concept.  It has been around since the beginning of time. So why do we have such a hard time accepting it?

I think many of us want to feel good all the time.  Whatever that means.

What is feeling good?  The pursuit of pleasure and happiness?  There was a time in my life when I equated that with the purpose of my life.  Constantly I sought out FUN, happiness, pleasure!  I tried it on for size.  But it never quite fit the way I thought it would.  I think I was constantly trying to convince myself that I felt good.

Nowadays, I am not even sure what feeling good means.  Feeling good… What a shallow term.  How about feeling full of life and light?  That I can relate to.  That has depth that means something to me.  Feeling good…it’s too elusive.  That fleeting moment can come and go in an instant.  Not to mention if I am constantly worried about whether or not I’m feeling good, chances are I’m not going to feel good.  I’m going to feel worried… And I’m going to be stuck on myself. And I’m going to be stuck in my head, which often is a rather precarious place to be.

So no, I don’t always feel good.

But damn it, I do feel pretty content.

There are days when I doubt myself, my purpose, my place in the world.  But those days make the other days burn brighter.  My heart leaps with joy at the renewal of my spirit.  It is a pretty phenomenal feeling.

Let us remember that no one feels good all the time.

It simply isn’t the human condition.

If you meet someone who says they feel good all the time–they’re lying.  Call me a cynic, but I just don’t believe it. 

I do believe we have choices. We can choose to look at the glass half full.  We can shift our perspective, as I have touched on before. We can connect with others and give thanks for what we have. But to expect ourselves to always have that giddy feel-good sensation is to set us up for a lifetime of disappointment with the world and ourselves.

Ups and downs.  Round and around.  This is the pattern of life.  It all works together to create a mosaic that is who we are and what we experience.

Without sorrow, there is not joy.

Without despair, there is not hope.

Without darkness, there is not light.

Let me remember there is a reason and a season for all things.

So ride that wave–Surf’s up!